It’s Nice, To Be Nice.

Around the same time as reporting some of the unsavoury behaviour by “others”, “friends” (from the same circle) took it upon themselves to involve my daughter by deciding that we were no longer welcome as part of an organised group outing, an event via the Tree House – that we could not watch “Peter Pan” by Chickenshed, with them when I had already paid for our tickets.

The point at the time was that two of these “friends” who are well-known to Chickenshed therefore they were bringing Chickenshed into disrepute by deciding themselves that I and my daughter could not come to watch a show by Chickenshed. Lizzie Ward-McLaughlan (also known as Elizabeth Ward) and her husband, Daniel Ward-McLaughlan, did not even give me a chance or the choice, to ask whether I wanted the tickets myself to sell on at face value so I could get my money back or if I/we still wanted to go… They simply decided for us and that, we were no longer welcome. Just like that?! All due to their personal bias and manipulation / influence from others – they all, also went around spreading lies to deter people from using the Tree House and to destroy me by defaming my character.

They wanted particular details to send me, my refund but I was suspicious that they would use my private details for other reasons and so I refused to share that and requested the refund be donated to a charity instead with proof of receipt for my records. This made losing the money for the tickets I bought, that bit less painful.

We were all appalled at this form of despicable behaviour and how childish “they” were being. My daughter is only 8 years old at this point in time and she was being so much more mature than they were, despite being let down over an opportunity to watch an inspirational show by inspirational people.

Of course, I decided to report them to Chickenshed because this was wrong and extremely unfair, especially on my daughter who was looking forwards to going out on a wintry night to watch a Christmas pantomime amidst the christmas cheer. Stuff like this, for children, is what memories are made of but then again “they” all didn’t have any children so “they” would never understand the disappointment, responsibilities and priorities I had.

I sent Chickenshed all the hard evidence and correspondence I had experienced, asking Chickenshed to make “them” stop in their tracks and to make them think of the consequences their actions were having, on Chickenshed too.

Chickenshed very kindly took it all on board and offered me two tickets out of goodwill, for another performance instead. Which was very much appreciated at the time and we were extremely grateful for. Result!

A drop of kindness goes a long way and it does not do any harm…

Why It Pays To Report

If you experience any kind of manipulation, oppression or bullying in any sense at all – always report them especially with hard evidence. I have had qualms in the past about reporting people but it is the only way to get them to reflect upon their behaviour by exposing them. And sometimes reporting them will actually make them stop misbehaving and improvements being made to their code of conduct and policies – one example (of several) follows;

“Dear Sara Jae,

 RE: Complaint of Harassment and Bullying Behaviour (Reference number: withheld for privacy)

 Thank you for bringing to our attention your concerns with regard to our recently elected Trustee and long term volunteer Mr Richard Turner and a new volunteer with Action on Hearing Loss, Eloise Garland.

 I have investigated your complaint in depth in accordance with our complaints policy and I have examined the relevant documents supplied and these have been discussed and reviewed with Richard and Eloise as part of my investigation.

 My investigation considered two specific areas:-

 

  1. The actions of Richard and Eloise as volunteers of Action on Hearing Loss including that of Trustee in Richard’s case.

 

  1. Whether or not it is appropriate for Action on Hearing Loss to comment on discussions within a social media context over which we have no authority and where people comment within a personal capacity.

 

Before advising of the outcome of my investigation it is appropriate to provide information regarding our Trustee Board.

 Our Trustee Board comprises nominated and elected Trustees. An elected Trustee is a person who puts forward their name, is then nominated by a member and is then subject to election by our membership. The election is overseen by the Electoral Reform Service and the person with a majority of votes is duly elected to the vacant position. Provided the person meets standards outlined by the Charity Commission and Companies House they are appointed. Action on Hearing Loss and the Board of Trustees have no right of veto over an elected Trustee. One of our strengths as a charity is having a mix of nominated professionals and elected supporters as Trustees. Richard is one of our newly elected Trustees.

 With regard to both points therefore I have concluded the following:-

 

  1. Action on Hearing Loss has noted with concern the distress caused by various comments made by RT. However these comments were not made in a capacity as a volunteer for Action on Hearing Loss they were the comments of RT and EG as private individuals. Therefore we do not consider it is appropriate to take any formal action at this stage. RT has not breached any rules as a trustee (which is also a volunteer role in Action on Hearing Loss). However it is apparent that the language used at times in these communications could be seen as inflammatory and misleading. We therefore recognise the need to emphasise to RT and EG along with all our volunteers the requirement to separate any personal comments and any indication that these are the views of Action on Hearing Loss.  I shall also follow up with advice to RT and EG and all volunteers the need to be aware that language used in Social Media should be constructed in a way that demonstrates respect to people at all times. To this end we will review and update the following documents and policies:-

 

–          Our Volunteer Handbook

–          Our Induction Training for Trustees

–          Our Social Media Policy

–          Our Bullying and Harassment Policy

 

  1. As a national charity with over 1400 volunteers, on this occasion we do not consider it appropriate to comment on whether inappropriate behaviour has taken place on an independent forum. For example people do sometimes use social networking sites and forums and other forms of social media to air their grievances which appears to have been the case on both sides in these instances.  People also see social media as a channel for free speech and there can be confusion over what is acceptable behaviour in the use of social media. Both parties have had disagreements about things relating to the Tree House site and related activities and have aired these disagreements publicly on this site and forum which has caused further disagreement and distress between parties.

I know from your correspondence with me that you have been upset and distressed and I very much appreciate you having raised your concerns with us and will take the actions identified above to safeguard against a repetition of this nature. We are also pleased to note that you will continue to support the Charity and the work of Action on Hearing Loss. Finally I would like to reassure you that we will continue to deal with complaints with the utmost seriousness and investigate fully in accordance with our policies.

 Yours sincerely

(name kept anonymous for privacy)

Action on Hearing Loss (Formerly RNID)”

 

As for NADP?? Well, I am not going to hold my breath for sure since they elected themselves in and ran it to the ground. Any bets on when I will hear from them? 😛

lidia NADP